Today we discussed the rest of Peter Singer's argument.
During World Poverty Part 1 we put together a list of concerns about Singer's argument. They were:
1. We don't think the money we donate will actually reach the needy.
2. Most people don't donate their money, why should we?
3. So I'm never supposed to have fun again?
Being a good arguer, Singer had already anticipated these concerns and addressed them in the second part of the essay.
1. (We don't think the money we donate will actually reach the needy.) The $200 estimate was made with the knowledge that there are sometimes dictators that hijack supply planes, administrative costs, embezzlement, etc. All of those eventualities were accounted for in the $200 estimate.
2. (Most people don't donate their money, why should we?) Basing your morality on other people's morality is fallacious. It's called following the crowd. You alone are responsible for your own morality.
3. (So I'm never supposed to have fun again?) Think about it this way. Every $200 you spend over your needs could have saved a child. What is more valuable, $200 or the life of a child. At the beginning of the argument you agreed with me that the life of a child is not only more valuable than $200 but more valuable than a million dollar car. Life is more important than stuff. Therefore, every time you spend money on a luxury, you have chosen to not save a child's life.
During the course of our discussions the main concern we voiced that Singer was unable to answer was: "Give me the hard numbers. Show me that my money will make it to the needy." Since Singer was writing for The New Yorker, he wasn't anticipating an audience that would want lots of numbers to go through. Had he been writing for a more academic publication he certainly would have included the numbers.
The most interesting thing about the discussion to me was that everyone in the room agreed that a life was more important than stuff (and that, by extension, a life was more important than $200), but that everyone fought against applying that principle in a practical way. No one was willing to forgo their X-box or their new prom dress to save a life.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
New Reading Day By-laws
To help you all take better advantage of reading days, I am instituting the following by-laws:
1. One reading day = 10 points. This means that if you don't read during a reading day, the points you can get on your book report decreases by 10 points.
2. You must read the book you are going to report on during reading time.
3. People who do not want to read during reading day will write essays instead.
These new by-laws go into effect immediately and will apply to the next book report.
1. One reading day = 10 points. This means that if you don't read during a reading day, the points you can get on your book report decreases by 10 points.
2. You must read the book you are going to report on during reading time.
3. People who do not want to read during reading day will write essays instead.
These new by-laws go into effect immediately and will apply to the next book report.
World Poverty Part 1
Tuesday we read and discussed a few pages of Peter Singer's essay 
"The Singer Solution to World Poverty," which you can read by clicking on the link.
In the essay he gives us the story of Dora,
"Should Dora go save the child?"he asks. To which we replied, "Of course." Then he continues, "Is there a moral difference between Dora buying a television at the cost of a child's life, and an American buying a television when he knows that the money he will spend on the television will save a child's life?"
Pretty much everyone in the class thought there was a huge difference. Encapsulated, most of us argued that we are not aiding the killing of children through our purchase the way Dora did.
Singer then gives us the parable of Bob and his Bugatti.
Pretty much the whole class thought Bob had done the wrong thing. Many of us said we would not be able to live with ourselves if we had committed such an act. "If you have the chance to save a child, you should," we argued.
And that's where Peter Singer gets us. He tells us that it takes only $200 to save a child's life in a third-world country and then gives us the phone numbers of two organizations that we can donate to.
Singer has essentially put us in the role of Bob. We are standing at the railroad switch whenever we have $200 above and beyond our needs. Every time we spend $200 on a commodity, we are letting a child die.
The reaction to Singer's idea was pretty unanimous. No one in class liked it. "What?" we were saying, "you mean that we can't buy books or a new CD or a computer game because to do so would mean that we're deliberately letting a kid die?" Most of us were unwilling to live under the weight of this moral onus.
We'll see how our discussion continues next week.
"The Singer Solution to World Poverty," which you can read by clicking on the link.In the essay he gives us the story of Dora,
"Dora is a retired schoolteacher who makes ends meet by sitting at the station writing letters for illiterate people. Suddenly she has an opportunity to pocket $1,000. All she has to do is persuade a homeless 9-year-old boy to follow her to an address she has been given. (She is told he will be adopted by wealthy foreigners.) She delivers the boy, gets the money, spends some of it on a television set and settles down to enjoy her new acquisition. Her neighbor spoils the fun, however, by telling her that the boy was too old to be adopted — he will be killed and his organs sold for transplantation."
"Should Dora go save the child?"he asks. To which we replied, "Of course." Then he continues, "Is there a moral difference between Dora buying a television at the cost of a child's life, and an American buying a television when he knows that the money he will spend on the television will save a child's life?"
Pretty much everyone in the class thought there was a huge difference. Encapsulated, most of us argued that we are not aiding the killing of children through our purchase the way Dora did.
Singer then gives us the parable of Bob and his Bugatti.
Bob is close to retirement. He has invested most of his savings in a very rare and valuable old car, a Bugatti, which he has not been able to insure. The Bugatti is his pride and joy. In addition to the pleasure he gets from driving and caring for his car, Bob knows that its rising market value means that he will always be able to sell it and live comfortably after retirement. One day when Bob is out for a drive, he parks the Bugatti near the end of a railway siding and goes for a walk up the track. As he does so, he sees that a runaway train, with no one aboard, is running down the railway track. Looking farther down the track, he sees the small figure of a child very likely to be killed by the runaway train. He can't stop the train and the child is too far away to warn of the danger, but he can throw a switch that will divert the train down the siding where his Bugatti is parked. Then nobody will be killed -- but the train will destroy his Bugatti. Thinking of his joy in owning the car and the financial security it represents, Bob decides not to throw the switch. The child is killed. For many years to come, Bob enjoys owning his Bugatti and the financial security it represents.
Pretty much the whole class thought Bob had done the wrong thing. Many of us said we would not be able to live with ourselves if we had committed such an act. "If you have the chance to save a child, you should," we argued.
And that's where Peter Singer gets us. He tells us that it takes only $200 to save a child's life in a third-world country and then gives us the phone numbers of two organizations that we can donate to.
If you still think that it was very wrong of Bob not to throw the switch that would have diverted the train and saved the child's life, then it is hard to see how you could deny that it is also very wrong not to send money to one of the organizations listed above.
Singer has essentially put us in the role of Bob. We are standing at the railroad switch whenever we have $200 above and beyond our needs. Every time we spend $200 on a commodity, we are letting a child die.
The reaction to Singer's idea was pretty unanimous. No one in class liked it. "What?" we were saying, "you mean that we can't buy books or a new CD or a computer game because to do so would mean that we're deliberately letting a kid die?" Most of us were unwilling to live under the weight of this moral onus.
We'll see how our discussion continues next week.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Weak Logos
Today we watched a clip from The Awful Truth where Michael Moore tries to get presidential candidates to jump in a mosh pit in order to get the show's endorsement. He goes from candidate to candidate without any luck until he meets up with Alan Keyes who does indeed body surf on the mosh pit.
We decided that Moore's thesis was that a person who was willing to dive into a mosh pit would make a good president.
Moore's ethos was right on for most of the classes. We tended to like Moore's "normal guy" ethos. He doesn't dress well, he's not too handsome, he's kinda big, but he doesn't seem to care. Many students said they identified with him more, and trusted him more because of this ethos. Other students were completely turned off by him, however.
Moore made good use of pathos as well, bringing in music from Rage Against the Machine to get our blood pumping, and structuring the show along good storytelling lines ending with the victory of getting Alan Keyes to jump into the pit. He also encouraged our disdain of all the candidates who were too stuck up to jump in.
It was Moore's logos that seemed to suffer. Though he presented a clear thesis, "a person who can jump into a mosh pit would make a good president," he didn't bring up any reasons why this is so.
Some students pointed out that the reasons were presented subtly. For example, they argued that a person who is willing to be a normal, fun loving person would be able to gain the trust and loyalty of Americans more easily than a stuffed shirt. They also argued that such a candidate would be able to work well with the nation's youth.
We decided that Moore's thesis was that a person who was willing to dive into a mosh pit would make a good president.
Moore's ethos was right on for most of the classes. We tended to like Moore's "normal guy" ethos. He doesn't dress well, he's not too handsome, he's kinda big, but he doesn't seem to care. Many students said they identified with him more, and trusted him more because of this ethos. Other students were completely turned off by him, however.
Moore made good use of pathos as well, bringing in music from Rage Against the Machine to get our blood pumping, and structuring the show along good storytelling lines ending with the victory of getting Alan Keyes to jump into the pit. He also encouraged our disdain of all the candidates who were too stuck up to jump in.
It was Moore's logos that seemed to suffer. Though he presented a clear thesis, "a person who can jump into a mosh pit would make a good president," he didn't bring up any reasons why this is so.
Some students pointed out that the reasons were presented subtly. For example, they argued that a person who is willing to be a normal, fun loving person would be able to gain the trust and loyalty of Americans more easily than a stuffed shirt. They also argued that such a candidate would be able to work well with the nation's youth.
Three Puppets
Tuesday we made logos, ethos and pathos concrete in our minds by channeling them through puppets.
I started things by arguing that farting in public would lead to the next ice age. I established my ethos by putting on a puppet with a uniform and having him be Colonel Sanders, head of Homeland Security. He used his drill sergeant voice to bring us to attention and then told us that the study we were about to hear had been conducted over 30 years and had cost 50 million dollars.
This established a few things in the audience's mind. First, a guy as important at Colonel Sanders was standing behind this project. And second, that a lot of time, thought and money had gone into the findings. This is a good ethos, it makes us more willing to believe the actual argument.
Next I took out a doctor doll and used her to say that she had been studying weather patterns for 30 years and had found a definite link between public farting and the chilling of the atmosphere. She also said that public farting was the leading cause of the progress of the ice age, even more so than the flapping of butterfly wings.
This is good logos because the doctor gave actual reasons backed up by data.
Finally I brought out Bobby Sue Ellen McGee, a mother of 10 children who all wanted to go to Disneyland with all their sweet innocent little hearts. Bobby had been saving for this trip for years. But if the ice age comes too soon, they won't be able to go to Disneyland and the hearts of her children will be broken beyond repair. "For the sake of the children, stop farting in public," she plead.
This was good pathos because it was aimed at our emotions. No one wants to disappoint 10 little kids. Especially when their mother has scrimped for so many years to help them fulfill their dream of going to Disneyland.
I started things by arguing that farting in public would lead to the next ice age. I established my ethos by putting on a puppet with a uniform and having him be Colonel Sanders, head of Homeland Security. He used his drill sergeant voice to bring us to attention and then told us that the study we were about to hear had been conducted over 30 years and had cost 50 million dollars.
This established a few things in the audience's mind. First, a guy as important at Colonel Sanders was standing behind this project. And second, that a lot of time, thought and money had gone into the findings. This is a good ethos, it makes us more willing to believe the actual argument.
Next I took out a doctor doll and used her to say that she had been studying weather patterns for 30 years and had found a definite link between public farting and the chilling of the atmosphere. She also said that public farting was the leading cause of the progress of the ice age, even more so than the flapping of butterfly wings.
This is good logos because the doctor gave actual reasons backed up by data.
Finally I brought out Bobby Sue Ellen McGee, a mother of 10 children who all wanted to go to Disneyland with all their sweet innocent little hearts. Bobby had been saving for this trip for years. But if the ice age comes too soon, they won't be able to go to Disneyland and the hearts of her children will be broken beyond repair. "For the sake of the children, stop farting in public," she plead.
This was good pathos because it was aimed at our emotions. No one wants to disappoint 10 little kids. Especially when their mother has scrimped for so many years to help them fulfill their dream of going to Disneyland.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Logos, Ethos and Pathos on Parade
Today we watched a segment from Michael Moore's television show "The Awful Truth." The story was about how an HMO wouldn't pay for a life-saving pancreas transplant for Chris.
Moore does a number of things to get the HMO to change its mind: he invites the head honchos and the employees to Chris's funeral and then holds a funeral rehearsal outside the HMO's headquarters. The HMO finally agrees to pay for Chris's transplant.
As we watched this show we noted how Michael Moore used logos, ethos and pathos to persuade us.
He established his ethos immediately by showing us that a real person's life was on the line. Not only that, but a real person with a wife and two young daughters. He gave us every reason to believe that anything that could be done to save this guy's life was worth it.
Next, Moore went on to solidify our commitment to him by showing Chris giving his two daughters a push on the swing set and then cutting to an interview where Chris says, "I have two daughters. They need a dad," and then breaks down. This is how Moore used pathos to appeal to us.
To appeal to the logical (logos) side of us Moore gave us facts and figures about how much money Humana makes, how much its corporate officers make , and how many pancreas transplants that kind of money translates into.
Moore also makes excellent use of story structure to invest us in Chris's plight. He casts Chris as the underdog, unjustly oppressed by a rich, heartless corporation. We know from earlier in this class that the more opposition a hero has to overcome, the more we invest in that hero. It also really helped that the PR guy Moore and Chris took on came across as being so callous.
We did notice, however, that Humana was never given a chance to represent itself. Did Humana have a really good reason why it wasn't willing to pay for the transplant? We will never know. Perhaps Humana's reason was so good that Moore's case would have been destroyed.
On the other hand, a sure way to boost your ethos is to let the other side have its say and then show how their reasons don't hold up. Then the audience says to itself, "Hah. Even when given a chance, the opposition cannot defend its decisions." You'll have the audience totally on your side if you are able to do that.
Moore does a number of things to get the HMO to change its mind: he invites the head honchos and the employees to Chris's funeral and then holds a funeral rehearsal outside the HMO's headquarters. The HMO finally agrees to pay for Chris's transplant.
As we watched this show we noted how Michael Moore used logos, ethos and pathos to persuade us.
He established his ethos immediately by showing us that a real person's life was on the line. Not only that, but a real person with a wife and two young daughters. He gave us every reason to believe that anything that could be done to save this guy's life was worth it.
Next, Moore went on to solidify our commitment to him by showing Chris giving his two daughters a push on the swing set and then cutting to an interview where Chris says, "I have two daughters. They need a dad," and then breaks down. This is how Moore used pathos to appeal to us.
To appeal to the logical (logos) side of us Moore gave us facts and figures about how much money Humana makes, how much its corporate officers make , and how many pancreas transplants that kind of money translates into.
Moore also makes excellent use of story structure to invest us in Chris's plight. He casts Chris as the underdog, unjustly oppressed by a rich, heartless corporation. We know from earlier in this class that the more opposition a hero has to overcome, the more we invest in that hero. It also really helped that the PR guy Moore and Chris took on came across as being so callous.
We did notice, however, that Humana was never given a chance to represent itself. Did Humana have a really good reason why it wasn't willing to pay for the transplant? We will never know. Perhaps Humana's reason was so good that Moore's case would have been destroyed.
On the other hand, a sure way to boost your ethos is to let the other side have its say and then show how their reasons don't hold up. Then the audience says to itself, "Hah. Even when given a chance, the opposition cannot defend its decisions." You'll have the audience totally on your side if you are able to do that.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Logos, Ethos and Pathos
Today we talked about logos, ethos and pathos. They are the three elements that go into persuasion.
We illustrated each of these elements by telling a story about Bob.
This is Bob. He has four arms and four legs, which makes it difficult to get a girl to go out with him. But finally he finds one on MySpace named Maude, and he doesn't want to ruin his chance.
So, he showers thoroughly, making sure to wash all four armpits well. Then he puts on a good suit that downplays his extra limbs (but still has enough pockets for each hand, plus one). He is stylin'.
On his way to Maud's house he stops by the florist and picks up a single perfect rose.
When he gets to Maud's house he holds the rose out to her with a flourish. She sighs and says, "Oh, Bob, it's so beautiful," to which Bob replies,
Bob has successfully used all three elements of persuasion.
Ethos is how a person presents him or herself. For example, the ethos of KISS (makeup, leather, spiked boots) is much different from the ethos of Brittany Spears (makeup, leather, spiked books ... wait). Bob took his ethos very seriously. He wanted to make himself as attractive as possible to Maud. Perhaps he even found out what colors she liked and chose his outfit accordingly.
Pathos is how a person works with emotions. Bob chose a single perfect rose because he knows girls love flowers, especially perfect ones. Flowers never fail to make a girl happy. And he wanted her to be happy when she saw him.
Logos is one's ability to reason and appeal to logic. Bob knew that his answer to Maud's declaration of the beauty of the flowers left the perfect logical opening for him to say the perfect thing.
Bob will no doubt have his hands (all four of them) full trying to use his logos to convince Maud that having a man with four arms and four legs is a good thing, but we have no doubt he will do well, because he clearly understands how to use the three elements of persuasion:
Ethos: presentation of oneself
Pathos: prowess with emotions
Logos: logic and convincing power
If Bob didn't have one of these bases covered, his plan would have fallen apart. Without ethos, he might have shown up looking like he just finished fixing his car, or smelling bad. Without pathos, he would not have been able to appeal to Maud's emotions. Without logos he'll never be able to convince her that a man with only two arms is no man at all.
So remember: the suit, the rose and the speech bubble.
We illustrated each of these elements by telling a story about Bob.
This is Bob. He has four arms and four legs, which makes it difficult to get a girl to go out with him. But finally he finds one on MySpace named Maude, and he doesn't want to ruin his chance.So, he showers thoroughly, making sure to wash all four armpits well. Then he puts on a good suit that downplays his extra limbs (but still has enough pockets for each hand, plus one). He is stylin'.
On his way to Maud's house he stops by the florist and picks up a single perfect rose.
When he gets to Maud's house he holds the rose out to her with a flourish. She sighs and says, "Oh, Bob, it's so beautiful," to which Bob replies,
Bob has successfully used all three elements of persuasion.Ethos is how a person presents him or herself. For example, the ethos of KISS (makeup, leather, spiked boots) is much different from the ethos of Brittany Spears (makeup, leather, spiked books ... wait). Bob took his ethos very seriously. He wanted to make himself as attractive as possible to Maud. Perhaps he even found out what colors she liked and chose his outfit accordingly.
Pathos is how a person works with emotions. Bob chose a single perfect rose because he knows girls love flowers, especially perfect ones. Flowers never fail to make a girl happy. And he wanted her to be happy when she saw him.
Logos is one's ability to reason and appeal to logic. Bob knew that his answer to Maud's declaration of the beauty of the flowers left the perfect logical opening for him to say the perfect thing.
Bob will no doubt have his hands (all four of them) full trying to use his logos to convince Maud that having a man with four arms and four legs is a good thing, but we have no doubt he will do well, because he clearly understands how to use the three elements of persuasion:
Ethos: presentation of oneself
Pathos: prowess with emotions
Logos: logic and convincing power
If Bob didn't have one of these bases covered, his plan would have fallen apart. Without ethos, he might have shown up looking like he just finished fixing his car, or smelling bad. Without pathos, he would not have been able to appeal to Maud's emotions. Without logos he'll never be able to convince her that a man with only two arms is no man at all.So remember: the suit, the rose and the speech bubble.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
What Dr. Doom can teach us about essays
Today we followed the exciting adventures of the Fantastic Four who had just been captured by the diabolical Dr. Doom.
Our job, as members of the Future Supervillains of America club, was to devise a room that could hold all members of the Fantastic Four simultaneously, while keeping them alive to serve our nefarious schemes.
We came up with some good stuff, like locking them in an Adaminium cage (to keep The Thing from breaking out), suspended over a very deep canyon by magnets (so that Mr. Fantastic couldn't stretch himself to saftey. The cage would be alloyed with napalm so that if the Human Torch combusted and tried to fly out he would sizzle all his friends.
We then looked at what the real Dr. Doom did in issue 5 of the Fantastic Four comic book. He threw a net over the Fantastic Four's building. The net was made of asbestos so that the Human Torch could not burn through it. It was also electrified so that the Thing couldn't rip it apart. (We're not sure why Mr. Fantastic couldn't stretch himself thin and get through the holes, though.) In this way Dr. Doom captured the Fantastic Four.
Which leads us to the first thing Dr. Doom can teach us about writing an essay:
You must capture your audience at the very beginning.
Dr. Doom then took Susan Storm hostage and sent the rest of the Four on a mission to steal Blackbeard the Pirate's treasure. When the Four returned with the treasure, Dr. Doom locked them in an airless chamber. Thus, the Human Torch could not ignite, not to mention the fact that none of them could breathe.
However, Dr. Doom was not keeping a good eye on Susan Storm, who managed to short circuit Dr. Doom's machine and save her compadres.
Dr. Doom did not take every one of the Fantastic Four into account. Otherwise he would have won, and Marvel Comics would not have made millions of dollars on the Fantastic Four franchise.
Thus we come to the second thing we can learn from Dr. Doom about writing essays:
You must take every single member of your audience into account, otherwise, one of them will find a way to blow up your essay and set the other people you have captured free.
And you wouldn't want that.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Reading Assignment
The reading assignment for this term is to read 4 books or 800 pages. Whichever you prefer. The two requirements for book eligibility are that 1. the book have over 40,000 words, and 2. the book be approved by me.
I am instituting this assignment because 1. Lyman has low reading scores, and 2. We have lost the 20 minutes of reading each day that we had last year.
Since I know that many of you have busy lives outside of school, I am providing in-class time for you to read. We will read during class on Mondays and Fridays. This plan has been endorsed by Mary Thrasher, the district's reading consultant.
To get credit for your reading you need to fill out a Book Report Sheet.
Make sure you pick books that you will enjoy.
Since I am providing in-class time for this assignment I am going to require that you finish a book and turn in a book report on these dates:
Book 1: November 16
Book 2: December 7
Book 3: December 21
Book 4: January 11
Late book reports will not be accepted.
I am instituting this assignment because 1. Lyman has low reading scores, and 2. We have lost the 20 minutes of reading each day that we had last year.
Since I know that many of you have busy lives outside of school, I am providing in-class time for you to read. We will read during class on Mondays and Fridays. This plan has been endorsed by Mary Thrasher, the district's reading consultant.
To get credit for your reading you need to fill out a Book Report Sheet.
Make sure you pick books that you will enjoy.
Since I am providing in-class time for this assignment I am going to require that you finish a book and turn in a book report on these dates:
Book 1: November 16
Book 2: December 7
Book 3: December 21
Book 4: January 11
Late book reports will not be accepted.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
The Essentials of Argument Structure
An argument is:
A claim with reasons to support the claim.
In the music video "Fat," the big guys accuse Weird Al of not being fat. Weird Al makes the claim that he is fat and gives them reasons to support his claim.
Reason 1
My zippers bust, my buckles break,
I'm too much man for you to take.
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I've got more chins than Chinatown
Notice that these reasons are pretty small time. They are easily refutable. After all, haven't all of us broken a zipper or a buckle at one time or another? Thus, we have the jab. It's a small flurry of reasons, meant not so much to convince the reader as to tenderize him/her.
Reason 2:
Well, I've never used a phone booth
And I've never seen my toes
When I'm goin' to the movies
I take up seven rows
These reasons are more convincing. Especially the one at the end. It would be pretty impossible for anyone to take up seven rows unless he or she were truly fat. Thus, we have the cross punch. Jabs have only the weight of the arm behind them. the cross punch has the weight of the whole body.
Reason 3:
When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach I'm a lucky man
I'm the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie ala mode
I'm gonna need my own ZIP code
This is the final blow. There's no way to get out of this reasoning. Science backs up Weird Al's claim with the Richter scale, and the government is backing him up with the promise of a zip code.
Save the best reason for last and knock your opponent flat.
Note that essay structure very closely follows dramatic structure. There's a protagonist (the writer) and the antagonist (the audience). The protagonist starts with small conflict (reasons) and escalates to larger conflicts (reasons).
In summary:
When you start an essay think of a claim, and reasoning to back it up. Start with the smaller reasons (the jabs), go to the bigger reasons (the crosses), and end with the best, most irrefutable reason you have (the upper cut).
A claim with reasons to support the claim.
In the music video "Fat," the big guys accuse Weird Al of not being fat. Weird Al makes the claim that he is fat and gives them reasons to support his claim.
Reason 1
My zippers bust, my buckles break,
I'm too much man for you to take.
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I've got more chins than Chinatown
Notice that these reasons are pretty small time. They are easily refutable. After all, haven't all of us broken a zipper or a buckle at one time or another? Thus, we have the jab. It's a small flurry of reasons, meant not so much to convince the reader as to tenderize him/her.Reason 2:
Well, I've never used a phone booth
And I've never seen my toes
When I'm goin' to the movies
I take up seven rows
These reasons are more convincing. Especially the one at the end. It would be pretty impossible for anyone to take up seven rows unless he or she were truly fat. Thus, we have the cross punch. Jabs have only the weight of the arm behind them. the cross punch has the weight of the whole body.
Reason 3:
When I walk out to get my mail
It measures on the Richter scale
Down at the beach I'm a lucky man
I'm the only one who gets a tan
If I have one more pie ala mode
I'm gonna need my own ZIP code
This is the final blow. There's no way to get out of this reasoning. Science backs up Weird Al's claim with the Richter scale, and the government is backing him up with the promise of a zip code.
Save the best reason for last and knock your opponent flat.
Note that essay structure very closely follows dramatic structure. There's a protagonist (the writer) and the antagonist (the audience). The protagonist starts with small conflict (reasons) and escalates to larger conflicts (reasons).
In summary:
When you start an essay think of a claim, and reasoning to back it up. Start with the smaller reasons (the jabs), go to the bigger reasons (the crosses), and end with the best, most irrefutable reason you have (the upper cut).
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Dialogue Exercises
From: CHARACTER MAKES THE STORY
By Sol Stein
Dialogue is a foreign language, different from whatever language a writer has grown up using. It can make people unknown to the writer cry, laugh and believe lies in seconds. It is succinct, can carry a great weight of meaning in few words, and, above all, it is adversarial. That doesn't mean shouting. Adversarial dialogue can be subtle. It also has modes that are akin to pitches in baseball, fastballs, curve balls, sinkers. Let me give you a couple of examples.
Here's an Elmore Leonard character propositioning a woman with a curve ball: 'Let's get a drink and talk for a few days.' A sinker is useful for comedy: 'Are you going to let go of me, or shall I scream and let the neighbors see you in your undershirt?'
Characters reveal themselves in dialogue best when they are under stress and blurt out things they never meant to say.
What counts in dialogue is not what is said, but what is meant.
Dialogue is not at all like recorded speech. Evidence: Court transcripts are recorded speech, and awfully boring.
Exercises:
1. "Writers get a great weight of meaning in few words"
Go through your script. Remove half the words from each dialogue line without losing any meaning.
2. Curve ball: 'Let's get a drink and talk for a few days.' A curve ball is when the audience thinks it knows where a line is going, but is surprised by where it ends up. Go through your script and put in a curve ball.
3. Sinker: 'Are you going to let go of me, or shall I scream and let the neighbors see you in your undershirt?' A sinker is when a character pitches a line in such a way that the antagonist is unable to hit it back. Go through your script and put in a sinker.
By Sol Stein
Dialogue is a foreign language, different from whatever language a writer has grown up using. It can make people unknown to the writer cry, laugh and believe lies in seconds. It is succinct, can carry a great weight of meaning in few words, and, above all, it is adversarial. That doesn't mean shouting. Adversarial dialogue can be subtle. It also has modes that are akin to pitches in baseball, fastballs, curve balls, sinkers. Let me give you a couple of examples.
Here's an Elmore Leonard character propositioning a woman with a curve ball: 'Let's get a drink and talk for a few days.' A sinker is useful for comedy: 'Are you going to let go of me, or shall I scream and let the neighbors see you in your undershirt?'
Characters reveal themselves in dialogue best when they are under stress and blurt out things they never meant to say.
What counts in dialogue is not what is said, but what is meant.
Dialogue is not at all like recorded speech. Evidence: Court transcripts are recorded speech, and awfully boring.
Exercises:
1. "Writers get a great weight of meaning in few words"
Go through your script. Remove half the words from each dialogue line without losing any meaning.
2. Curve ball: 'Let's get a drink and talk for a few days.' A curve ball is when the audience thinks it knows where a line is going, but is surprised by where it ends up. Go through your script and put in a curve ball.
3. Sinker: 'Are you going to let go of me, or shall I scream and let the neighbors see you in your undershirt?' A sinker is when a character pitches a line in such a way that the antagonist is unable to hit it back. Go through your script and put in a sinker.
Benchmarks We've Covered This Term
For your viewing pleasure, following are the benchmarks we have covered during the term.
1. When we were doing critical thinking bell work we covered these benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.A.1: Uses context to understand figurative, idiomatic and technical meanings of terms.
10.1.A.2: Extends general and specialized reading vocabulary.
10.1.A. 3: Understands writing techniques used to influence readers.
10.1.A.4: Understands the philosophical assumptions and basic beliefs underlying an author's work.
10.1.C.4: Analyzes techniques used to convey viewpoints or impressions.
10.1.C.5: Uses discussions with peers as a way of understanding information.
10.1.C.6: Uses text features and elements to support inferences and generalizations about information.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.6: Writes expository compositions.
2. When we did story sheets as bell work we covered the following benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.B.2: Analyzes the use of complex elements of plot in specific literary works.
10.1.B.5: Understands the effects of author's style and complex literary devices and techniques on the overall quality of a work.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of prewriting strategies.
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of strategies to draft and revise written work.
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.5: Uses strategies to adapt writing for different audiences and purposes.
10.2.A.7: Writes fictional, biographical, autobiographical, and observational narratives.
10.2.B.6: Organizes ideas to achieve cohesion in writing.
Viewing and Media:
10.4.A.1: Uses a range of strategies to interpret visual media.
10.4.A.2: Uses strategies to analyze stereotypes in visual media.
3. When we learned story structure, outlined, wrote and revised our screenplays we covered the following benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.B.2: Analyzes the use of complex elements of plot in specific literary works.
10.1.B.3: Knows archetypes and symbols.
10.1.B.4: Understands how themes are used across literary works and genres.
10.1.B.5: Understands the effects of author's style and complex literary devices and techniques on the overall quality of a work.
10.1.B.6: Understands relationships between literature and its historical period, culture and society.
10.1.B.7: Makes connections between his or her own life and the characters, events, motives and causes of conflict in texts.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of prewriting strategies.
10.2.A.2: Uses a variety of strategies to draft and revise written work.
10.2.A.3: Uses a variety of strategies to edit and publish written work.
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.5: Uses strategies to adapt writing for different audiences and purposes.
10.2.A.7: Writes fictional, biographical, autobiographical, and observational narratives.
10.2.B.1: Uses precise and descriptive language that clarifies and enhances ideas.
10.2.B.3: Uses a variety of sentences structures and lengths.
10.2.B.4: Uses a variety of transitional devices.
10.2.B.6: Organizes ideas to achieve cohesion in writing.
10.2.C.1: Uses the parts of speech accurately and effectively in writing.
10.2.C.2: Uses conventions of language in written compositions.
10.2.C.3: Uses commonly confused terms in written compositions.
10.2.C.4: Uses standards format in written compositions.
Viewing and Media:
10.4.A.3: Understands the connection between context and values projected by visual media.
10.4.A.4: Understands how images and sound convey messages in visual media.
10.4.A.5: Understands effects of style and language choice in visual media.
1. When we were doing critical thinking bell work we covered these benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.A.1: Uses context to understand figurative, idiomatic and technical meanings of terms.
10.1.A.2: Extends general and specialized reading vocabulary.
10.1.A. 3: Understands writing techniques used to influence readers.
10.1.A.4: Understands the philosophical assumptions and basic beliefs underlying an author's work.
10.1.C.4: Analyzes techniques used to convey viewpoints or impressions.
10.1.C.5: Uses discussions with peers as a way of understanding information.
10.1.C.6: Uses text features and elements to support inferences and generalizations about information.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.6: Writes expository compositions.
2. When we did story sheets as bell work we covered the following benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.B.2: Analyzes the use of complex elements of plot in specific literary works.
10.1.B.5: Understands the effects of author's style and complex literary devices and techniques on the overall quality of a work.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of prewriting strategies.
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of strategies to draft and revise written work.
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.5: Uses strategies to adapt writing for different audiences and purposes.
10.2.A.7: Writes fictional, biographical, autobiographical, and observational narratives.
10.2.B.6: Organizes ideas to achieve cohesion in writing.
Viewing and Media:
10.4.A.1: Uses a range of strategies to interpret visual media.
10.4.A.2: Uses strategies to analyze stereotypes in visual media.
3. When we learned story structure, outlined, wrote and revised our screenplays we covered the following benchmarks:
Reading Benchmarks:
10.1.B.2: Analyzes the use of complex elements of plot in specific literary works.
10.1.B.3: Knows archetypes and symbols.
10.1.B.4: Understands how themes are used across literary works and genres.
10.1.B.5: Understands the effects of author's style and complex literary devices and techniques on the overall quality of a work.
10.1.B.6: Understands relationships between literature and its historical period, culture and society.
10.1.B.7: Makes connections between his or her own life and the characters, events, motives and causes of conflict in texts.
Writing Benchmarks:
10.2.A.1: Uses a variety of prewriting strategies.
10.2.A.2: Uses a variety of strategies to draft and revise written work.
10.2.A.3: Uses a variety of strategies to edit and publish written work.
10.2.A.4: Evaluates own and other's writing.
10.2.A.5: Uses strategies to adapt writing for different audiences and purposes.
10.2.A.7: Writes fictional, biographical, autobiographical, and observational narratives.
10.2.B.1: Uses precise and descriptive language that clarifies and enhances ideas.
10.2.B.3: Uses a variety of sentences structures and lengths.
10.2.B.4: Uses a variety of transitional devices.
10.2.B.6: Organizes ideas to achieve cohesion in writing.
10.2.C.1: Uses the parts of speech accurately and effectively in writing.
10.2.C.2: Uses conventions of language in written compositions.
10.2.C.3: Uses commonly confused terms in written compositions.
10.2.C.4: Uses standards format in written compositions.
Viewing and Media:
10.4.A.3: Understands the connection between context and values projected by visual media.
10.4.A.4: Understands how images and sound convey messages in visual media.
10.4.A.5: Understands effects of style and language choice in visual media.
Monday, October 22, 2007
It's the Final Countdown
I've been impressed by the quality of the stories you've put out. Structure-wise, they are better written than a lot of the writing I saw in graduate school.
The term ends on Friday. 70 percent of your grade hangs on how well you do on your screenplay. You have Monday through Friday to complete your screenplays and polish them.
Today I am emailing all of you my commentary on your screenplays. I have the computer lab reserved for Monday through Friday. Take advantage of this time. If you don't feel like you can complete your work at class, I strongly suggest that you do some work at home.
Friday is the absolute final day you can turn in your polished screenplay. That's not my edict, it's the school district's. Please refer to the rubric to see what I will be grading on. It's a good idea to do a self-evaluation against the rubric before turning in your screenplay.
I look forward to reading your work.
The term ends on Friday. 70 percent of your grade hangs on how well you do on your screenplay. You have Monday through Friday to complete your screenplays and polish them.
Today I am emailing all of you my commentary on your screenplays. I have the computer lab reserved for Monday through Friday. Take advantage of this time. If you don't feel like you can complete your work at class, I strongly suggest that you do some work at home.
Friday is the absolute final day you can turn in your polished screenplay. That's not my edict, it's the school district's. Please refer to the rubric to see what I will be grading on. It's a good idea to do a self-evaluation against the rubric before turning in your screenplay.
I look forward to reading your work.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Analysis Sheet
Name:
Period:
Write the protagonist’s name.
Summarize the protagonist’s goal.
Write the antagonist’s name.
Summarize why the protagonist and antagonist are in conflict.
Summarize the protagonist’s dramatic need.
Go through the script and mark when the scene changes without a location line by writing “LL” next to where the location line should be.
Go through the script and mark with an “A,” the places where action lines slip into the heads of the characters.
Go through the script’s action lines and find the places where dialogue lines should be located but are not. Mark these places with a “DL.”
Summarize the three escalating events from the screenplay
1.
2.
3.
Find the place where the protagonist fulfills his/her dramatic need. Summarize 1. What ACTION the protagonist takes to fulfill his/her dramatic need, and 2. What SACRIFICE is required for the protagonist to take that action.
1.
2.
Period:
Analysis Sheet
Write the protagonist’s name.
Summarize the protagonist’s goal.
Write the antagonist’s name.
Summarize why the protagonist and antagonist are in conflict.
Summarize the protagonist’s dramatic need.
Go through the script and mark when the scene changes without a location line by writing “LL” next to where the location line should be.
Go through the script and mark with an “A,” the places where action lines slip into the heads of the characters.
Go through the script’s action lines and find the places where dialogue lines should be located but are not. Mark these places with a “DL.”
Summarize the three escalating events from the screenplay
1.
2.
3.
Find the place where the protagonist fulfills his/her dramatic need. Summarize 1. What ACTION the protagonist takes to fulfill his/her dramatic need, and 2. What SACRIFICE is required for the protagonist to take that action.
1.
2.
Screenplay for Analysis
The Librarian
INT: LIBRARY - DAY
Lippy, a librarian, scuttles down an aisle of books. She’s thinking about where she should place a book in her hands.
She passes by an eight year old boy. He’s reading a book. Ohhh, I’m going to get this kid, she thinks.
She walks up to the kid.
LIPPY
Now young man, you know you aren’t allowed in
the adult section of the library.
BOY
But there’s nothing good in …
LIPPY
No lip from you, sonny. Get out!
Now young man, you know you aren’t allowed in
the adult section of the library.
BOY
But there’s nothing good in …
LIPPY
No lip from you, sonny. Get out!
She throws the boy out. He tumbles down the outside steps of the library.
Lippy growls and adjusts her glasses.
LIPPY
Now to get that book where it belongs.
Now to get that book where it belongs.
She walks down another aisle and runs into a short man with glasses a mustache. He’s reading the same book the little kid had been reading. She looks hard at the short man and then grabs the book out of his hand.
The man jumps back. He’s thinking, oh no, she caught me. Lippy snatches the glasses off, revealing the little boy. He snuck in again! She chases him around the library, upstairs downstairs, through the museum. And finally she catches him.
She takes him by the ear and throws him out the door.
LIPPY
And don’t you come back!
And don’t you come back!
INT: LIBRARY – NIGHT
The library is empty. LIPPY walks down another aisle and finally finds the shelf for her book. But it’s way high up. She stands on her tip toes, but still can’t reach. She climbs up the book shelves.
Suddenly the shelves start to teeter.
LIPPY
Oh no!
Oh no!
The shelf tips over and dumps books all over her. An especially large book falls last, knocking Lippy on the head. Her eyes close. She’s unconscious.
A man walks by. He’s very tall. He has glasses and a mustache.
MAN
(in an unusually high voice)
Are you OK?
(in an unusually high voice)
Are you OK?
Lippy doesn’t answer because, of course, she’s knocked out and unconscious people can’t talk.
The man takes off his pants, revealing long stilts underneath. Then he whips off his glasses and mustache. It’s the little boy!
He jumps down from the stilts and takes the books off of Lippy.
Lippy’s eyes flutter open. Where am I?
BOY
Are you OK, Mrs. Librarian?
LIPPY
You saved me!
Are you OK, Mrs. Librarian?
LIPPY
You saved me!
The boy blushes.
BOY
It was lucky I walked by when I did.
It was lucky I walked by when I did.
INT: LIBRARY CIRCULATION DESK – NIGHT
Lippy signs a card and hands it to the boy. The card says
CARD
ADULT LIBRARY CARD
ADULT LIBRARY CARD
The little boy smiles at her. He places a book on the counter. It title says:
BOOK
Great Librarians Throughout the Ages.
Lippy beams at the boy and runs the book under the scanner.
The End.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Screenplay Rubric
Though I already passed these out three weeks ago, I am posting the rubric for the screenplays here. Remember that the screenplay is worth 70 percent of you grade (if you want to remember why, go to the syllabus). So take a look and decide how you think your work stacks up. As always, I'd be happy to help you improve your screenplay. We still have another week for you to revise your screenplay in class.
You can increase the size of the image by clicking on it.
You can increase the size of the image by clicking on it.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Rough Drafts Due Wednesday
Rough drafts of your screenplays are due Wednesday, October 17 at the end of class. We will have the computer lab during Wednesday's class, but not Tuesdays. If you are pretty far behind, I'd suggest you work on your screenplays at home. Especially since 70 percent of your grade hangs on how well your screenplay works out. (Don't worry, we will critique the screenplays and have a week to revise them. So your rough draft will only have to be rough.)
Remember that we're shooting for the 7 page mark.
Make sure to email your screenplay to yourself so you have it at school.
I look forward to reading your stories.
Remember that we're shooting for the 7 page mark.
Make sure to email your screenplay to yourself so you have it at school.
I look forward to reading your stories.
Method behind my madness
A student asked me an interesting question the other day.
I have a philosophy of teaching that is different from most. What I see going on in most English classrooms is teachers presenting stories to their class and saying, "Lo, here is a perfect story sent to us from on high. Praise it." And then the class needs to write about characterization this, setting that, language the other thing.
So the students are always consumers of literature. The literature is always above them waiting to be worshiped.
I have a different approach. I want to make all of you into producers of literature. I want you to be writers before you become analyzers. I want you to experience, first hand, what it's like to write a creative work. I want you to take it from conception to outline to draft to finished product. Once you have done that, you will know what it's like to be a writer.
As writers yourselves, you can approach literature as a fellow craftsman rather than as a worshiper. You know what it's like to write a story. Thus, you can use your own experience to analyze it. Because you KNOW what it's like to create a story. You've done it.
Instead of assuming that the story in front of you is perfect and needs only praise, you can actually look at the writer's craft and tell what is working and what isn't. And believe me, from time to time, I'm going to give you some lame stories to read. I'll expect you to be able to say, 'This is a lame story," and be able to back up your assertion with good, craft-founded evidence.
It's kind of like me and cars. I barely know how to open the hood of my car. I have only the vaguest notion of what goes on inside the engine. The only way I could tell the difference between a Kia Sephia engine and a Ferrari engine is by what name is printed on it. I can only use engines; I have no idea to how construct them. So if you made me try to analyze engines, I wouldn't get too far. I'd probably just parrot back what the teacher said.
However, if I actually learned to build an engine, if I made one of my own, I'd be able to analyze engines much better. I could tell when one wasn't working. I could tell how powerful an engine was. I'd know better how to fix an engine
That's what we're doing. We're building engines.
"What in the world does screenwriting have to do with me passing PAWS and the SAT next year?"It's a good question.
I have a philosophy of teaching that is different from most. What I see going on in most English classrooms is teachers presenting stories to their class and saying, "Lo, here is a perfect story sent to us from on high. Praise it." And then the class needs to write about characterization this, setting that, language the other thing.
So the students are always consumers of literature. The literature is always above them waiting to be worshiped.
I have a different approach. I want to make all of you into producers of literature. I want you to be writers before you become analyzers. I want you to experience, first hand, what it's like to write a creative work. I want you to take it from conception to outline to draft to finished product. Once you have done that, you will know what it's like to be a writer.
As writers yourselves, you can approach literature as a fellow craftsman rather than as a worshiper. You know what it's like to write a story. Thus, you can use your own experience to analyze it. Because you KNOW what it's like to create a story. You've done it.
Instead of assuming that the story in front of you is perfect and needs only praise, you can actually look at the writer's craft and tell what is working and what isn't. And believe me, from time to time, I'm going to give you some lame stories to read. I'll expect you to be able to say, 'This is a lame story," and be able to back up your assertion with good, craft-founded evidence.
It's kind of like me and cars. I barely know how to open the hood of my car. I have only the vaguest notion of what goes on inside the engine. The only way I could tell the difference between a Kia Sephia engine and a Ferrari engine is by what name is printed on it. I can only use engines; I have no idea to how construct them. So if you made me try to analyze engines, I wouldn't get too far. I'd probably just parrot back what the teacher said.
However, if I actually learned to build an engine, if I made one of my own, I'd be able to analyze engines much better. I could tell when one wasn't working. I could tell how powerful an engine was. I'd know better how to fix an engine
That's what we're doing. We're building engines.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Screenplay format
Screenplays are different from essays, novels or short stories in that they are used exclusively as directions to the shooting crew and actors. Therefore, all the language in a screenplay is visual. In other words, it tells us what we can see on the screen. It does not tell us thoughts or attitude. Only what we can see.
There are three elements to screenplay format:
1. The Location Line. This line appears whenever the scene changes. It tells us three things:
A. Whether we are inside or outside.
B. What kind of place we are at.
C. Whether it is daytime or night time.
For example, if the scene is in Billy Bob's Bowling Alley during a league tournament we could write:
INT: BILLY BOB'S BOWLING ALLEY - NIGHT
If the scene is at a water park we could write:
EXT: WATER PARK - DAY
The location line is used whenever the scene changes. It is written in ALL CAPS.
2. The Action Line tells us what we see on the screen. It does not tell us what the characters are thinking, it does not tell us what their goals are. It only tells us what we see.
For example, for the scene in the bowling alley we might write this:
LuAnne holds a pink bowling ball up to her mouth. She breathes on it three times and then mutters something lovingly into one of its finger holes.
Or if we are writing a scene at the water park, we might write:
Shay takes a running start and jumps cannonball styles into the wave pool. A giant splash goes up, soaking a pair of girls sunning themselves on the deck. They scream.
Notice that neither of these two lines tell what the character is thinking or what their goal is. That is because action lines are visual. The action lines, well written, can convey a character's attitudes.
3. The Dialog Line is for letting the actors know what they should say and (when its important) how they should say it. The name of the speaker is always centered, and the speech itself will have three inch margins on both sides.
For example, we could write some dialog lines for LuAnne at the bowling alley:
There are three elements to screenplay format:
1. The Location Line. This line appears whenever the scene changes. It tells us three things:
A. Whether we are inside or outside.
B. What kind of place we are at.
C. Whether it is daytime or night time.
For example, if the scene is in Billy Bob's Bowling Alley during a league tournament we could write:
INT: BILLY BOB'S BOWLING ALLEY - NIGHT
If the scene is at a water park we could write:
EXT: WATER PARK - DAY
The location line is used whenever the scene changes. It is written in ALL CAPS.
2. The Action Line tells us what we see on the screen. It does not tell us what the characters are thinking, it does not tell us what their goals are. It only tells us what we see.
For example, for the scene in the bowling alley we might write this:
LuAnne holds a pink bowling ball up to her mouth. She breathes on it three times and then mutters something lovingly into one of its finger holes.
Or if we are writing a scene at the water park, we might write:
Shay takes a running start and jumps cannonball styles into the wave pool. A giant splash goes up, soaking a pair of girls sunning themselves on the deck. They scream.
Notice that neither of these two lines tell what the character is thinking or what their goal is. That is because action lines are visual. The action lines, well written, can convey a character's attitudes.
3. The Dialog Line is for letting the actors know what they should say and (when its important) how they should say it. The name of the speaker is always centered, and the speech itself will have three inch margins on both sides.
For example, we could write some dialog lines for LuAnne at the bowling alley:
LUANNE
(whispering to bowling ball)
(whispering to bowling ball)
Go to glory on guilded wings my little rolling man.
Or the recently wetted girls could have their say:
GIRL
Who did that? Whoooooo did that!
These are the three elements of screenplay format.
1. The Location Line
2. The Action Line
3. The Dialog Line
For an example of how they work together to make a screenplay, CLICK HERE.
These are the three elements of screenplay format.
1. The Location Line
2. The Action Line
3. The Dialog Line
For an example of how they work together to make a screenplay, CLICK HERE.
Some tips to get you started
Today we're starting on our 7-page screenplays. You should have already put together a "Dramatic Need Story Sheet" during class to guide your writing.
If you're having a hard time thinking of what to write:
1. Take out your Dramatic Need Story Sheet.
Look at #7: Scene Setup. A. Is it inside or outside? B. Where does it take place? C. What time of day is it? D. What is the character doing?
Use A, B, and C to write your location line:
INT: SMALL LAME APARTMENT - NIGHT
2. Now use D to write your first action line:
Mike, twenty something, unshaven, take a black t-shirt out of a closet filled to the gills with black t-shirts.
3. Now look at your first event. What does the character do? Write it down using action lines. Remember, these are instructions to the shooting crew and the actors. So write visually.
He turns the phone off and drops it on the table as he plunges to his top dresser drawer. He digs around and finally comes out with a spiky leather collar. He inspects the spikes and finds one that doesn’t meet with his standards. He licks it and polishes it with his shirt.
4. Do any of the characters say anything? Put it in a dialogue line:
If you're having a hard time thinking of what to write:
1. Take out your Dramatic Need Story Sheet.
Look at #7: Scene Setup. A. Is it inside or outside? B. Where does it take place? C. What time of day is it? D. What is the character doing?
Use A, B, and C to write your location line:
INT: SMALL LAME APARTMENT - NIGHT
2. Now use D to write your first action line:
Mike, twenty something, unshaven, take a black t-shirt out of a closet filled to the gills with black t-shirts.
3. Now look at your first event. What does the character do? Write it down using action lines. Remember, these are instructions to the shooting crew and the actors. So write visually.
He turns the phone off and drops it on the table as he plunges to his top dresser drawer. He digs around and finally comes out with a spiky leather collar. He inspects the spikes and finds one that doesn’t meet with his standards. He licks it and polishes it with his shirt.
4. Do any of the characters say anything? Put it in a dialogue line:
MIKE
(growling Zombie style)
Luna, Luna, Luna, you will be mine soon-ah.
Now just keep following your Dramatic Need Story Sheet. Translate what it says into visual language.
If you want to see what a screenplay looks like, CLICK HERE.
(growling Zombie style)
Luna, Luna, Luna, you will be mine soon-ah.
Now just keep following your Dramatic Need Story Sheet. Translate what it says into visual language.
If you want to see what a screenplay looks like, CLICK HERE.
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